Dear Joyce: I am starting a new job Jan. 8 and because I can't afford a misstep (it took me seven months to find this job), I'd like any suggestions for succeeding. -- C.H.J.

Dear C.H.J: Surprise! I've received many suggestions for workplace New Year's resolutions from people across the country. Perhaps my favorite suggestion comes from New York corporate-training consultant Andrea Nirenberg, who recommends showing sincere appreciation: "Saying 'thank you' is nice," Nirenberg writes, "but saying, 'Thank you for helping me save five hours of late-night work' and leaving a small box of candy on the person's desk, is more significant. The key is to be specific and to do something extra."

You can make quick points with a demonstration of gratitude; you're telling the recipient that his or her act made a difference in someone's life. If you're up for some heavy-duty advice, Robin Fisher Roffer's new book, "Make a Name for Yourself: Eight Steps Every Woman Needs to Create a Personal Brand Strategy for Success" (Broadway Books, 2000), is a fascinating look at how to beat the competition.

Dear Joyce: Last week my manager asked me to sign an agreement under which I would agree to arbitration rather than litigation if I ever become dissatisfied with the company's treatment of me. I'm happy with my job, but I'd rather not sign away any rights. Can I be fired if I refuse to sign? -- M.C.

Dear M.C.: For that answer, we'll have to wait until the U.S. Supreme Court rules on Circuit City Stores vs. Adams. This landmark case will determine whether employers can require workers to sign away their rights to litigation.

Post-employment agreements are less common than dispute-resolution agreements that are included in multiple-page job applications. This is one of the most disturbing questions I get, because mandatory arbitration creates a dramatic power imbalance between the employer and all but the most sought-after job applicants. As Chicago attorney Paul W. Mollica says in "Business Week:" "How many applicants are going to say, 'Before I apply for your $6-an-hour job, I'm going to hire an attorney to review the application?' And even if they did, how likely are they to be hired?" Not many, and not likely.

If the Supreme Court rules for Circuit City, the ongoing dilemma for job seekers will be whether to sign an arbitration requirement they resent, or walk away. The impending verdict may or may not shed light on post-employment arbitration contracts.

Dear Joyce: As a new attorney, I took a job with a solo-practitioner law firm. Now, a week later, I've been asked to interview with a much larger and more prestigious firm. Should I take the belated interview? -- S.L.

Dear S.L.: Yes. You're dealing not with a loyalty issue but with a career-management issue. This would be my advice even if you had been in your present job for six months. Read the papers: Employers make business decisions, not loyalty decisions, and when their best interests are threatened, they slash payroll. But common sense tells you that you can't overdo your job-hopping every six months, especially not in a profession in which people communicate as if they were neighbors in a small town.

Dear Joyce: One year ago, I re-entered the job market after 15 years of self-employment, during which time I worked solo. I've had difficulty with two female co-workers who want to talk about personal matters more than I care to. I am not cold. I like knowing some things about co-workers' lives, but I have an easier time in this regard with my male co-workers. How can I respond when the conversation turns to very personal matters and tears? -- D.D.

Dear D.D.: If you don't treat co-workers equally when dispensing compassion, the women will forge a united front against you. When gory details erupt, briefly show empathy: "I can only imagine how awful that must be for you." Or, "I'm sorry you're forced to deal with this terrible issue. But I have to be honest, I'll have severe problems of my own if I don't get back to work quickly. You know I'll hold good thoughts for you." Then leave. In the event of a real tragedy, forget strategies and just be a human being.

Send career questions for possible use in this column to Joyce Lain Kennedy at Box 368, Cardiff, CA 92007, or e-mail her at jlk@sunfeatures.com. Sorry, the volume of mail makes personal replies impossible.

© 2000, Los Angeles Times Syndicate